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Something bigger than I am

I'm uncomfortable with the word God. When I think of the word it's followed by ideas of make believe stories, organized religion, judgement and narrow-mindedness.

I've never used the word God until recently (and very occasionally) attending a church where I feel guided by the belief that God is Love. It is slowly since becoming a word more easily rolled off my tongue, sometimes even the name I address in prayer. But often it, that something I know is listening, doesn't have a name.

Having faith in something bigger than I am takes the weight of the world and worry off of my shoulders. A weight that can sometimes get so heavy that I can't bear it on my own.

Usually when I pray, I just simply say Thank You. It feels good to acknowledge the things I need to be grateful for and it also feels comforting to ask for peace and hope and to know I'm not alone in my thoughts that can sometimes create an incredible sense of loneliness. 

It's not always the unknown, this stranger of my Universe I thank and whose presence I've felt. It can be present in forms such as my Grandma who showed me she's with me in each Angel that fell from my Christmas tree last year or Ryker seeing a picture of the meadow where we spread Grump's ashes this year and then looking up at his Nana and saying, "He can see us."


It's everywhere, that something bigger than I am. I know it's there. I just don't know it's name.



Dec. 4, 2014


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